Editor’s note: This article is co-written by Alison Howard, Director of Alliance Relations at Alliance Defending Freedom and was originally published by the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission of the Southern Baptist Convention. Click here to view the article in its original format.
We are women age 26 and age 27. In many ways, our generation will be the last one to grow up in a United States knowing marriage legally as only a man/woman union. What will we tell our children about marriage as we knew it?
Here are five things we’ll have to tell our future children about the 2015 marriage decision.
1. Every generation has a battle to fight.
Our generation found itself in the middle of a dispute over the definition of the millennia-old institution of marriage. Arguments were heard on both sides. Debates were held on college campuses and media positioned opponents on panels to discuss the issue. But as the debate continued, those who didn’t like the time-tested view of marriage began their efforts to cut the conversation short.
Before we knew it, a fire chief and a 70-year-old grandmother were being threatened because of their faith convictions. They and others lost their jobs and their businesses. Then, the U.S. Supreme Court forced all 50 states to recognize same-sex unions as marriages, undermining the marriage policies affirmed by over 50 million voters in 31 states. We knew from history that when people of faith were forced to deny their deeply held beliefs, this was not progress, it was coercion. So we realized we were going to have to fight for the freedom to democratically address one of the most pressing social issues of our time.
2. Defend truth when it’s unpopular.
The hecklers reminded us how unpopular it was for us single, young Christian women to stand in front of the Supreme Court to defend and protect marriage.
When the Supreme Court mandated more than 40 years ago that every state legalize the killing of unborn children, pro-life advocates did not abandon the debate. The opposite happened. They refocused and passionately lobbied congressional offices, informed the masses, and counseled expectant mothers on abortion clinic sidewalks–all this after pro-lifers supposedly “lost.” Now, America’s youth are reportedly more pro-life than ever before, and abortion rates have dropped in every state.
3. Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves.
We knew that when the grown-ups finished redefining marriage in our laws, children like ours would be the ones to ultimately lose out—because they would be growing up in a society that no longer affirms the right of every child to know and be raised by both their mother and father.
Future children like ours deserve someone to say that all the love in the world can’t turn a mom into a dad or a dad into a mom. Marriage ensures the well-being of children by encouraging men and women to commit to each other and any children they create.
4. Show love even if you receive hate in return.
We stood in the face of hostility, because we loved that much. We truly loved those struggling with same-sex attraction enough to take the harassment and verbal assaults that came with speaking up. Our future children may face similar assaults but are still to show love in the face of hate.
5. Small groups of people can change history.
History teaches us that a small numbers can ignite change for good because of their willingness to confront the trends of popular culture. Every generation needs their Esthers, Susan B. Anthonys, Sojourner Truths, Rosa Parks, and Nellie Grays who will speak the truth in love no matter the consequences and no matter how “outnumbered” they may appear.
So when the day comes, Lord willing, and our children ask us, “What did you do when that big marriage case happened?,” with all sincerity we will reply, “We did what we could. We spoke the truth in love. The battle may have been lost, but the war is not over.”
Comment by MarcoPolo on July 24, 2015 at 4:47 pm
If the establishment of Law for the rights of women to allow self determination did anything to curb population growth, we should celebrate both. Roe v Wade shouldn’t be considered a crime. But rather, a liberty!
For those who don’t condone abortion, they still have the right to avoid the procedure. But they MUST not impede those who feel differently just because of ideology.
As for how you’ll describe the SCOTUS decision to your future children, depends upon upon your religious convictions, as well as how History dictates to your child. My father’s prejudices never stood a chance of percolating into my generation, so I suggest that when that time comes, you consider that every child has their own mind (and soul), and that you should respect that they might feel differently. In fact, at the risk of offending you, they might just be Gay themselves. (God forbid!)
Respectfully,
MarcoPolo
Comment by Jonathan Kuperberg on August 1, 2015 at 3:49 pm
And if they are homosexual they can be celibate and avoid sexual experience, living a godly life. Opposition to the deviance of two men or two women ‘marrying’ is NOT ‘prejudice’. I share many of the views (though not all) of previous generations, as a young pro-traditional-family man.
Comment by MarcoPolo on August 2, 2015 at 12:24 pm
I see my response to you has been removed….Hmmm?
Not by me! I guess somebody didn’t like my response? Go figure!
So at the risk of being censored again, I’ll restate my question.
If (God forbid, LOL!) one or more of your children were to proclaim themselves to be Gay or Lesbian, you would wish for them a life of celibacy? No sexual experience with another human being…EVER?! Even if they were married to their loved one?
So I guess you won’t be walking them down the aisle. And all because you hold a different opinion on human sexuality as it pertains to an ancient text?
Too bad for those children whose parents are stuck on a religious hangup, that they would be denied a happy and fulfilled life.
Let’s see if this comment withstands the moderator’s keystroke!
Comment by Jonathan Kuperberg on August 3, 2015 at 2:44 am
In response to your question about a hypothetical gay/lesbian child: Absolutely. I do not view fallible feelings of love or marriage under secular (or apostate religious) law as an acceptable moral validator of sexual activity.
I will only support my future children, if any, having sexual experience within God-ordained male-female Holy Matrimony.
I would not DARE walk down the aisle at a same-sex ‘wedding’; attendance at such an event is to be avoided unless one is specifically protesting the celebration of a sinful union and effort to make it respectable.
I reject your views that moral opposition to homosexual conduct is a “religious” “hangup” or mere opinion that one should lay aside; Jesus Christ made it clear putting family members above God is unacceptable and that is that. I believe it represents an eternal natural-law ordinance with the backing of Almighty God that does not change for cultural reasons, nor with the times. The fact it is found in “ancient text” does not even slightly reduce its moral validity, it is on a par with ancient moral prohibitions against lying, stealing, murder and worshiping false gods NOT customs or civil penalties like slavery, segregation, and stoning of adulterers.
I also oppose the view that sex is necessary for a “happy” and “fulfilled” life, as the experience of many celibate people proves otherwise. But if abstinence entailed a sacrifice in earthly fulfillment, of course I would wish that for my child as I have told you before, I am a faithful Christian who believes in an eternal afterlife and rejects the humanistic focus on the here-and-now which underpins SIECUS, Planned Parenthood, and the Esalen Institute among other pro-sexual experimentation factions.
I don’t see why the moderator should delete that either, as I have no problem with answering your question. It is a common question approvers of lesbianism/male sodomy ask to non-approvers and I answer it straightforwardly.
Comment by MarcoPolo on August 3, 2015 at 8:58 am
I respect your position on this matter, I just can’t endorse it for myself or my family.
Over the few years that I’ve experienced this Life, I’ve encountered many different people, with many different religious beliefs. I can certainly see how in a world of such diversity, that there would be such vastly different religious beliefs. And each religious faith would hope to have adherents as dedicated and faithful to it’s roots/tenets as you attest to be.
Congratulations on your conviction. Good luck with the likelihood of pressure and persecution, and may your God shine approval upon your devotion.
Thank you for your honest exchanges. That’s refreshing.
May we ALL continue in good health!
Namaste’
MarcoPolo
Comment by Nohm on July 24, 2015 at 5:54 pm
My kids are, thankfully, adults and already had their moral character established, so they have weathered the degradation of America pretty well. I don’t have much hope for grandkids, as they will have no memory of a world that tolerated diversity (people didn’t go ballistic over flags) and did not tolerate insanity (“marrying” two men). You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone, as the cliche goes, but I think even in the 1980s people of faith could see the writing on the wall, that the country we loved would cease to exist and become an unlovable place, not worthy of devotion. In an immoral world, at least we find ourselves bonding more closely with the handful of people who are not part of the crowd. Crowds are always wrong, no exceptions.